171007 – where my head is at

this damn cold.

of all the times i should get a cold.

my body feels drained and hurts from coughing.

as if my sleep patterns weren’t disturbed enough.

in the midst of changes in my life.

in the midst of recording something to fix broken impressions.

in the midst of writing my first solo live show in some time.

i pause recordings to spit out phlegm.

(im sorry, i know it’s gross, but if you are going to read about my reality you get it all)

it is hard to focus on the notes i’ve charted.

a path through my own space and time.

i sway between my own emotions and those of others.

trying to create to reveal to relate my own statement.

glitches and heavenly choirs. 

times that don’t fit. 

things i must fix. 

resolutions to find. 

maybe i push myself harder than i have to.

but sometimes, i don’t feel as though i have a choice.

i have to make something.

something beautiful.

oh black francis, where is my mind!? 
i suspect the cold medicine has kicked in. i just talked to my plant, gary.

and he talked back. 

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